Community Stories -

Grieving a Job That Didn’t Feel Like Work

I find myself with four more days in the best job I have ever had. Not just “best” on paper—but best spiritually, best in connection, best in how it feels in my soul. It doesn’t even feel like going to work. It feels like showing up to a place where I belong.

And I am beyond distraught. It is nearly unbearable.

Today, a 94-year-old church member called me just to tease me. She said, “You know our policy is that you can’t leave until we find your replacement.” It about made me cry. I adore her. Her name is Betty, and I will miss seeing her on a regular basis more than I can put into words—along with so many others.

We always say we’ll stay connected, but somehow it rarely happens. Will this time be different? Will I stay connected with some of these people? And if I do, will it feel the same… or will it slowly shift into something more like an acquaintance?

I sure hope Pastor continues to have me pet sit. I love her—and her dogs—and I will truly grieve if I lose that connection too. I have lost so many connections in my life already. I cannot bear to lose more.

Does anyone have words of advice or encouragement? Am I overreacting? I don’t think I am. I have never had a job where I didn’t dread Mondays—or dread going to work at all. This was different. This was special.

And letting go of something special hurts.

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